As promised, here is the picture of me as Santa.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Rich Jandt Adventure #16
For this story we need to go back about a week, to the night I performed the marriage.
Joel and Barb had come out for a few celebratory drinks, and I happily drove them home. (They have been putting me up for the past few weeks till I get my truck fixed).
I used to drive like a devil, but in my old age have started to drive like a grandma, never speed, never go through yellow lights, come to complete stops all of it. Well for some reason I took a left on a red light, down a road I don't usually go down anyway. Joel was complaining about my horrific driving when I almost hit what I think is a coyote.
Since it was 3AM I pulled over and went to look at the dog. It was small, grey, and a bobbed tail. It also had a horrible limp. Joel was walking fastly toward the dog which made it walk fastly away. I tricked it by hiding my approach behind a bus stop and was able to pick it up. It was very calm and did not try to bite me. I noticed it was bleeding from a rear paw, and we decided to take it home until we found the owner.
Well at home I noticed just how many celebratory drinks Joel and Barb had had, so I decided to join them and drank a few glasses of red wine. By the time we got the dog in the house, and fed it and examined the paw and gave it water I was feeling fairly celebratory myself.
It was at this time I decided to post a lost and found on craigslist. This is what came out.
Found elderly nice tempered dogFound on 27th heading north early on the 3rd of January.
Don't know, maybe mixed Aussie shep terrier something. Brown with white and dark spots. Fawn motif, Bobbed tail. Short legs. Someone elses guess was a cattle dog, and a third guess is it is husky like. But it is not husky like at all. Really short. almost a corgy face. Cant post picture due to intoxication.
Super nice demeanor, we will be taking care of it until owner calls.
About an hour later I remembered to go back and repost it with my name and number.
Joel and Barb had come out for a few celebratory drinks, and I happily drove them home. (They have been putting me up for the past few weeks till I get my truck fixed).
I used to drive like a devil, but in my old age have started to drive like a grandma, never speed, never go through yellow lights, come to complete stops all of it. Well for some reason I took a left on a red light, down a road I don't usually go down anyway. Joel was complaining about my horrific driving when I almost hit what I think is a coyote.
Since it was 3AM I pulled over and went to look at the dog. It was small, grey, and a bobbed tail. It also had a horrible limp. Joel was walking fastly toward the dog which made it walk fastly away. I tricked it by hiding my approach behind a bus stop and was able to pick it up. It was very calm and did not try to bite me. I noticed it was bleeding from a rear paw, and we decided to take it home until we found the owner.
Well at home I noticed just how many celebratory drinks Joel and Barb had had, so I decided to join them and drank a few glasses of red wine. By the time we got the dog in the house, and fed it and examined the paw and gave it water I was feeling fairly celebratory myself.
It was at this time I decided to post a lost and found on craigslist. This is what came out.
Found elderly nice tempered dogFound on 27th heading north early on the 3rd of January.
Don't know, maybe mixed Aussie shep terrier something. Brown with white and dark spots. Fawn motif, Bobbed tail. Short legs. Someone elses guess was a cattle dog, and a third guess is it is husky like. But it is not husky like at all. Really short. almost a corgy face. Cant post picture due to intoxication.
Super nice demeanor, we will be taking care of it until owner calls.
About an hour later I remembered to go back and repost it with my name and number.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Rich Jandt Adventure #15
I was broke for most of my college experience. I sold plasma for extras like dating hot chicks and eating food not in the cafeteria.
I had asked a chick out that I really liked, and went to sell plasma in the afternoon for some cash. Selling plasma is a fairly easy way to make money. You sit in a chair and watch TV while a guy sticks you with a needle, and a machine draws out some blood, then separates the plasma out, then puts it back into your arm. Easy.
Well this time they forgot to attach the hose to the machine and after about 45 min. I looked over and saw about 3 pints of my blood on the front of the machine and in a huge pool on the floor. I freaked, the techs freaked, I got paid an extra $50 because they messed it up.
It would have been a great date if I had not had to stay an extra hour to fill out paper work, then ride the bus back to school. By the time I got back I was SO dizzy I could barely stand. I met the lady in the lower JC and she was pissed that I was late. She got over it when she found out that I sold my body just to go out with her, but I fell asleep like 5 times during the movie.
Honestly, I do not remember how the evening ended.
I had asked a chick out that I really liked, and went to sell plasma in the afternoon for some cash. Selling plasma is a fairly easy way to make money. You sit in a chair and watch TV while a guy sticks you with a needle, and a machine draws out some blood, then separates the plasma out, then puts it back into your arm. Easy.
Well this time they forgot to attach the hose to the machine and after about 45 min. I looked over and saw about 3 pints of my blood on the front of the machine and in a huge pool on the floor. I freaked, the techs freaked, I got paid an extra $50 because they messed it up.
It would have been a great date if I had not had to stay an extra hour to fill out paper work, then ride the bus back to school. By the time I got back I was SO dizzy I could barely stand. I met the lady in the lower JC and she was pissed that I was late. She got over it when she found out that I sold my body just to go out with her, but I fell asleep like 5 times during the movie.
Honestly, I do not remember how the evening ended.
Rich Jandt Adventure #14
Speaking of broken noses...
I was hired to be a key note speaker for a youth rally in Alaska. I made some good friends in a short amount of time and was asked to go for a walk by a couple of attractive young ladies. A friend of mine was dating one of the girls and I had been flirting with the other one for a week.
It was a very romantic setting. A dark night, around a frozen lake during a light snow. As happens when young people have trouble communicating, things turn physical and a snowball fight ensued. Unlike running, I am actually a fairly decent thrower. I made the perfect snowball to trow a long way, it was tightly packed, a little smaller than my palms, and completely round.
My intended target was around 100 feet away, and I wound up like I was a MLB pitcher and threw as hard as I could. My male friend popped up right at that moment three feet in front of me and caught said snowball right in the bridge of his nose. As stated before, I am not a medical professional, but he is. A medic in the armed forces to be exact.
First thing out of his mouth was "Why did you break my nose?". Pure and utter terror surrounded me and while I would usually run away, there was no where for me to go. The girls called me a jerk, and he was all pissed at me, and I couldn't explain myself.
Yeah, haven't talked to any of them ever again.
I was hired to be a key note speaker for a youth rally in Alaska. I made some good friends in a short amount of time and was asked to go for a walk by a couple of attractive young ladies. A friend of mine was dating one of the girls and I had been flirting with the other one for a week.
It was a very romantic setting. A dark night, around a frozen lake during a light snow. As happens when young people have trouble communicating, things turn physical and a snowball fight ensued. Unlike running, I am actually a fairly decent thrower. I made the perfect snowball to trow a long way, it was tightly packed, a little smaller than my palms, and completely round.
My intended target was around 100 feet away, and I wound up like I was a MLB pitcher and threw as hard as I could. My male friend popped up right at that moment three feet in front of me and caught said snowball right in the bridge of his nose. As stated before, I am not a medical professional, but he is. A medic in the armed forces to be exact.
First thing out of his mouth was "Why did you break my nose?". Pure and utter terror surrounded me and while I would usually run away, there was no where for me to go. The girls called me a jerk, and he was all pissed at me, and I couldn't explain myself.
Yeah, haven't talked to any of them ever again.
Rich Jandt Adventure #13
I wasn't always single, and at one time had a very active dating life. These next few posts will highlight some of my more humorous dates. To protect the innocent, I will not use names of the women I offended/injured on the encounters.
I don't know if you have ever been asked to do something you hate, but do it because you want to eventually kiss a hot chick.
There was this vary attractive red head. She was athletic, and hot and I was nervous to even speak to her. One day she walked through the men's lobby to ask me if I wanted to go on a run with her. We only ran one lap around the campus, from the lobby to Stark, up to 91st, back to Burnside and ending at her dorms. At the end of the run I asked her if she wanted to go to a movie sometime, and she said yes and walked up the steps.
I walked around the corner and fell to the ground gasping for breath. Completely seeing red spots and out of breath, full blown asthma attack. I was out of breath by the time we hit Stark, I only kept it up to ask her out at the end. Best/worst part was she walked around the corner while I was laying in the dirt to ask me when we would go out.
A week later we went out to watch "I know what you did last summer". I hate scary movies, I am a very big wuss. While she would cover her face with her hands during scary parts, I was pretending to be macho and would just flex and do my best not to jump. At the very end of the movie I inadvertently jumped and threw an elbow to her hands, covering her nose. I am not a medical professional, but I believe her nose was broken. A large amount of blood was pouring from her face.
Awesome. No second date here.
I don't know if you have ever been asked to do something you hate, but do it because you want to eventually kiss a hot chick.
There was this vary attractive red head. She was athletic, and hot and I was nervous to even speak to her. One day she walked through the men's lobby to ask me if I wanted to go on a run with her. We only ran one lap around the campus, from the lobby to Stark, up to 91st, back to Burnside and ending at her dorms. At the end of the run I asked her if she wanted to go to a movie sometime, and she said yes and walked up the steps.
I walked around the corner and fell to the ground gasping for breath. Completely seeing red spots and out of breath, full blown asthma attack. I was out of breath by the time we hit Stark, I only kept it up to ask her out at the end. Best/worst part was she walked around the corner while I was laying in the dirt to ask me when we would go out.
A week later we went out to watch "I know what you did last summer". I hate scary movies, I am a very big wuss. While she would cover her face with her hands during scary parts, I was pretending to be macho and would just flex and do my best not to jump. At the very end of the movie I inadvertently jumped and threw an elbow to her hands, covering her nose. I am not a medical professional, but I believe her nose was broken. A large amount of blood was pouring from her face.
Awesome. No second date here.
Friday, January 2, 2009
Congrats.
This morning I performed my first marriage.
My really good friends Joel and Barb asked me to do the honors of joining them as husband and wife.
It was actually really easy. The only real work was signing a form for the county.
Well that and the 5 years of college.
My really good friends Joel and Barb asked me to do the honors of joining them as husband and wife.
It was actually really easy. The only real work was signing a form for the county.
Well that and the 5 years of college.
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